When I was a young girl, I always wanted to be a princess or a ballerina. I wanted a name like Crystal, which sounded magical and powerful. I would twirl around in circles, very fast, trying to make myself grow up a little bit quicker. I wanted to be older, powerful and much more magical.
I have always done things quickly. I move from one thing to the next and don’t settle until I find exactly what I am looking for. I laugh loudly. I talk a lot. I still spin in circles, trying to make myself more powerful and magical everyday. But lately, I have been trying to slow things down. Not in fear of getting a little bit older, but in order to enjoy each and every moment around me.
When I was in college, I could have graduated a year early if I pushed myself, and I could’ve graduated a semester early with no effort at all. But my parents told me to stay in school, to “enjoy” college life. I was a huge nerd and due to a long string of circumstances, didn’t have too many friends at the time. There wasn’t anything I wanted to enjoy. I just wanted to get out of school and begin “real life.” By asking me to stay, they were asking me to enjoy life and slow down enough to see that each moment, even in school, is real life.
My last semester of school was good. I met a few more friends, got back in touch with old ones and generally had a good time. Then I graduated and got into a position teaching at a school. It was an okay job at first, and then it turned into a terrible, horrible, no good job at all. I had lost my ability to write, to love, to laugh & to run in circles. All I wanted was to get out. I felt so dizzy and lost. I waited my entire life to begin “real life” and didn’t like what I found at all. I needed a change, but I didn’t have any idea what I wanted.
While I was an elementary school teacher, I appreciated the horrible, terrible, no-good job. I was able to truly evaluate what made me happy. By sitting with the moments that I had and appreciating them – I was able to work through a lot of truths. I saw who I didn’t want to be, and in doing so, found who I wanted to become.
Appreciate each moment, even if that moment isn’t joy. Love. Laugh. Smile. SLOW DOWN. Live happy & free.
Get out there – do yoga & make life sparkle,
Namaste,
Jenny
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